The Now Happy vampire.

"Yes, she is Italian...everything is cooked in... in...garlic!!!!!
"The smell, the other wives are starting to complain. Even the children of the night are howling" moaned Drac.
"Well", said Vlad. "Just sit down and explain the problem to her and put a stop to it."
"Were that  it were that easy." replied Drac. "It makes her so happy and I...just cannot.."
"OK" said Vlad. "We need help and I know just the creature to call, Grrr Rex."
"Everyone knows of Grrr and holds him in high esteem" agreed Drac.
"But do you really think that he can help?  I am not going to counseling!  I am a Boyar and a warlord..that counseling stuff is for wimps" snarled Drac.
"No one said anything about wimps Drac. We are just looking for ideas...or... Do you want to go home and talk to the wives?" asked Vlad.
"No! " said Drac."Call Grrr".
Vlad called Grrr and explained the problem.
"I did not know that Vampires ate or drank, You know that  'I do not drink...vine"  and i do not sup' thing". said Grrr.
"It is that darn book and the movies again", replied Vlad. "In fact, we almost never do eat or drink but when in solid form we can, but it just does not have any taste.
"Is there anything you can think of?  This is driving Dracula up the wall,
and the family problems!!!!  said Vlad.
"Ok, said Grrr, the main problem here is the cooking smells? No, smells no problem?"
"Yes, said Vlad.
"Humm, seems to me then what your friend's kitchen needs is a better ventilation system.
Wives..huum..didn't you tell me the other day  that his other wives wanted a hot tub and Internet in the Castle..something about online shopping?"
"Yes", Vlad replied.
"Ok," run this past Dracula. I have a friend, Al Gator, who can re-do his kitchens and dining Hall.
 That keeps the new wife happy. The hot tub and the Internet keeps the other wives happy.
If he just gets something for the new wife, I foresee other...shall we say, family issues." said Grrr.
"Wonderful Grrr." I will talk to him at once and get back to you. Thanks again"  said Vlad.

.
Several weeks later, as Grrr was heading out for his morning run with Bob, he found a large..a dino-sized.. keg of vintage root-beer outside of his cave....attached was a card.

"My dear Grrr. 
Just a small gift from a grateful new friend.
I am not sure about the online shopping, I shall have to do a bit of digging on St. George's Night..

Just joking mein friend. 
The wives have not been so happy in 300 years.
I am starting to like der net as well..all the old movies. 
Your friend Mr. Gator did a noble job and the garlic problem is a thing of the past.
Thank you once again.
Count Dracula."